Of sadness and love.

God has a way making us realize a lot of things. I think that's why He's called the Master. Like, when things happen for unexplainable reasons, we trust that there is a Divine purpose behind it. Maybe the reality of it will surface soon or much later on. Then again, maybe not.

Whenever the fall season rolls and the whispers of the cold breeze blows, I always am drawn to introspection. While I love the season, these times bring me back bittersweet memories too. Dad passed away 10 days after we got married so whenever we celebrate our anniversary, we light a candle to commemorate dad's passing as well. There is still a little bit of sadness but there is more hope and peace more than anything else. For a short while, I pondered why such incidence happened but I learned that God's ways are NOT my ways and while we still miss him, we know too, that dad is happier where he is right now.

So, yes, we turned two years last September - thus the quick getaway. To say that time flew by is really a big understatement. It did seem like it was just yesterday yet, there's something comforting about the fact that we have done a lot of things as a couple within the span of 2 years.

In a society where staying married is more the exception than the norm, both hubby and I must have weathered a fair share of disagreements and opposing points of view and some back talks but they never were unresolved. We may be very different people - but only God must have figured that we are meant to be together, because eerily, hubby and I share the same values. Such qualities and hopes in life which I thought is only reserved for people of my race and faith. We are blessed to have found each other and we are ever grateful that in the two years, we are stronger.

In our last trip to Montana, we bonded more. We got lost reading the friggin' map (lol), we made concessions on what we can buy or pass up for now, admired the beautiful creations that is definitely God's, and just enjoyed each other away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. I think all couples need to do that. One does not need to have an extravagant vacation or holiday, sometimes, you just have to learn to like being in the presence of each other. In the 4 days we were away - we just savoured the time of being together. We had long talks - some were more reminiscing kind of stories, some about our next plans and hopes and dreams, some were yes, weird as it may sound - religion.

Traversing the winding roads of Montana is such a peaceful, joyous experience. It's like entering a quiet sanctuary where only the birds and the wilds live. Yet, there are actual cabins within the woods - in seclusion. So imagine a road where you can actually see rivers and lakes and an outburst of fall colours by your backyard... omg! it's wonderful! Our trip was made longer because we made a few more pitstops than usual because we wanted to see the awesome landscape in a "still" mode - as opposed to seeing it from a moving vehicle. Aren't we weird??? :) But that's us - we are 'alike' that way too! hahaha

And I know it's none of my business but I know that our neighbours to the right have called it quits. Guy seems to be keeping the house and girl moved out. They were a young couple - too young in fact that I feel sad for them. I often wondered - did they fall out of love? Did they just stayed angry at each other? Did they not spend time with each other? We (B and I) were quite neighborly with them so it was awkward when we saw the girl bringing out the pots and pans, clothes in garbage bags and sets of knives being hauled out from their place. What do you say to that?

Today might have been her last 'move out' day as she has a small moving pick up truck that took out the couch and two chairs with some antique-looking chest. I almost did not want to say anything (she almost did not want to look at me as well) but it's inevitable because she was by the front yard and I'm coming home by the front doors... I smiled and just muttered, "hey, are you having a garage sale?" to which she said, "not quite yet.." geez!!! She was sitting on her lawn with two occasional chairs and 2 chest/small armoire at -1C temperature- I did not want to embarrass her!!!! The guy was home too when she was doing this. She did not sit in the house - she was sitting outside. I did not want to speculate why such was the case - but bottomline, when you can actually smell and sense the collapse of something that should have been nice and wonderful as marriage - won't you feel sad too?

Tonight, when I sleep I will say my prayer of thanks for the wonderful two years and counting of our marriage... and another prayer for the couple beside us who chose what they chose to do. I hope that they will find peace and love again or get back together down the road...